Academy Award season is upon us, with the Oscars being polished up in anticipation of the big night. Who knows which Hollywood heavyweights and newcomers will be recognized for their seminal contributions to this year’s films? Suppose, however, that there was a drug industry version of the awards. What kind of categories would there be, and which films might be nominated for them? Let me suggest a few possibilities……
Nominees for the “Worst Business Plan I Ever Saw” award are:
1) Burn After Reading
2) The Black Hole
3) The Invention of Lying
4) The Ugly Truth
5) Mission Impossible
Nominated for the “Underachieving Startup” award this year are:
1) Failure to Launch
2) Clueless
3) Dazed and Confused
4) Lost in Space
5) Up the Creek
In the category “Best Performance by a Pharma Management Team” the nominees are:
1) Masters of the Universe
2) Flawless
3) Sweet Smell of Success
4) Paycheck
5) Friends with Money
And in the related “Worst Performance by a Pharma Management Team” category the nominees this year are:
1) Eyes Wide Shut
2) Take the Money and Run
3) Despicable Me
4) Superbad
5) Horrible Bosses
Nominees for the “Biggest Blockbuster” award are:
1) Money Train
2) A Fistful of Dollars
3) Kick-Ass
4) Limitless
5) Million Dollar Baby
In the category “It’s Project Review Time”, the nominees are:
1) The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
2) The Killing Fields
3) For Whom the Bell Tolls
4) Slaughterhouse-Five
5) Judgment at Nuremberg
Nominees for the “Sales Following Patent Expiration” award include:
1) Gone with the Wind
2) Less Than Zero
3) Gone in 60 Seconds
4) Sorry, Wrong Number
5) Apocalypse Now
Nominees for the “When Revenues Don’t Meet Wall Street’s Expectations” award include:
1) The Expendables
2) Here Comes the Boom
3) Wreck-It Ralph
4) The Forgotten
5) Looking for a Friend for the End of the World
And in the related “Corporate Restructuring (2nd Time This Year)” category the nominees are:
1) Edward Scissorhands
2) Exodus
3) Never Let Me Go
4) Goodbye, Mr. Chips
5) Farewell, My Lovely
In the category “Most Accurate Depiction of an FDA Review Panel Meeting” the nominees are:
1) Journey Into Fear
2) Appointment with Danger
3) The Desperate Hours
4) I Wake Up Screaming
5) Waiting to Exhale
In the “Wall Street Analysts Savage Your Pipeline” category, this year’s nominees include:
1) The Abyss
2) Land of the Lost
3) Holes
4) Missing in Action
5) Flirting with Disaster
In the category “Most Common Reaction to an FDA Non-Approvable Letter” the nominees are:
1) Kiss Tomorrow Goodbye
2) D.O.A.
3) Doomsday
4) Nightmare Alley
5) Tremors
Nominees in the category of “Best Performance By a Whistleblower” are:
1) The Sting
2) Catch Me If You Can
3) The Informant
4) Entrapment
5) Freddy Got Fingered
And finally, the annual “This Drug WILL be Approved” Optimist’s Award nominees are:
1) Hope Springs
2) Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
3) Life is Beautiful
4) The Joy Luck Club
5) Happy Endings
